So I pulled up the Darth Barca 2200 last night for an evening of some fine TV watching. I clicked the remote (yeah, I still have one of those remotes that clicks -- it also emits a high pitched tone to make the channel change) over to CBS and was ready for some Game Show time -- the way it was meant to be played, with B list celebrities galore. In case you haven't heard, CBS is running something called Gameshow Marathon. GSM features "celebrities" (defined by CBS as Lance Bass, Paige Davis, Tim Meadows, Kathy Najimy, Leslie Nielsen and Brande Roderick) playing well known TV game shows for charities (as if their careers aren't charities at this point).
Gameshow Marathon features six celebrity contestants competing in a weekly elimination-style tournament in which they play different classic game shows during each episode. Future episodes include 'Let's Make a Deal,' 'Beat the Clock,' 'Press Your Luck,' 'Card Sharks,' 'Match Game' and 'Family Feud.' A champion will be crowned at the end of the series. In addition, the program will include a viewer participation element whereby they will have a chance to win the celebrity's grand prize each episode through a wireless (text message) trivia game that enters viewers into a sweepstakes.
OK, so last night was Let's Make a Deal and I was all primed to watch Tim Meadows play Plinko. Did it happen? No. Did Tim play Hole in One? No. Race Game? No. Showcase Showdown? No. Tim never got his ass off of Contestants Row. Instead I got to watch him bark-out incorrect prices on grand father clocks and bizarre furniture for 45 minutes. Now that is entertainment!
How can CBS make this up to me? Either add Password to the list of games to be played or make Brande Roderick's clothes transparent. Ok, scratch the comment on Roderick. She would have to do a lot more than that in order for CBS to make up for this.
Editors Note: I want to be perfectly clear that I have no problem with Paige Davis getting airtime. No problem at all. As a matter of fact, CBS may be able to make things up to me by arranging for some quality time with Paige. Sorry Brande, it's time for you to go back to the "photo shoot" they found you at.
Let's get back to the heart of the matter, Tim Meadows. Here is where I think the show really made a mistake. Imagine harnessing the comedic power of Leslie Nielson playing Password with Tim Meadows.
Announcer whispers: "The Password is: Fittttttttttttthhhhhh Sandwich."
Tim: "fried food"
Leslie: "There are so many, I will say snickers."
Tim: "Surely you can't be serious!"
Leslie: "I am serious. And don't call me Shirley." He then falls down and rips his pants.
This is what America tuned in to see last night. Not Brande getting confused by the big spinning wheel or the Pricing Game. Come on CBS, if you are going to create this kind of crap, give us the good crap. I want to see Hasselhoff playing Press Your Luck. I want Brian Dennehy playing Tic Tac Dough! Is it really that tough? I don't think so.
One other thing. Ricki Lake sucks as a host. Give me Wink Martindale. From the looks of his site, he needs the money.
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