New Hillary Revelation

During a recent visit to a Pennsylvania restaurant, Hillary Clinton made the following statement to an employee in the kitchen, "honey, when I was a young lady and wasn't shooting guns at my uncle's house, I was washing dishes, just like you. One might say that my dishpan hands turned into dishpan thighs." Thighs that busboy would later wear as earmuffs.

Editors Note: The busboy in question has recently fled the country and returned to his native country of Guatemala, where he is seeking therapy.