Zoo keepers at Brookfield Zoo in suburban Chicago recently noticed that Joe Joe the black bear cub is the only bear at the zoo that does not masturbate. Zoo keepers initially provided Joe Joe with bear pornography, scantily furred female bears, and alcohol but to no avail. They even went so far as to put Joe Joe on Viagra, but this cubby couldn't grow a chubby. Zoo keepers now fear that he is gay and are arranging to send him to a zoo in the Florida Keys that accidentally received a straight bear.
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